Mrs Amrita Tiwari- My Torchbearer

The glass of nostalgia reaches it’s brim and heavily overflows when i recall my 10th grade class teacher, Mrs Amrita Tiwari. 

Magical bird takes flight.

She gave me wings.

The 2007-2008 academic calendar marked the valorous historic period of my life. If i write a book on it. I’d name it “101 shades of My Life”. I was not walking then, i was running in fact galloping faster than time. Reaching for everything that my eyes could see. Fearless my soul. Gallant my spirits.

My motto was-

Get Guts. Get Glory.

Among those numerous strands, my moments with Mrs Amrita rank highest. Every conversation that we had is anchored to my consciousness. Even those non-verbal ones when she was pleased/displeased with me, perch upon the very center of my brain. Do you wonder, why so? I’ll tell you. This woman overlooked the outer shell of my rough appearance and touched the right chords. Tuned to the right frequency. Calibrated the scales and played a music to me that was hypnotizing. And lost i was in it’s melody, it sent me on a voyage which helped me identify my potentials that were lying idle. She dug out the real person in me. I have heard, love has a lot of power. With her, i saw, how powerfully transforming, the effects of love can be.

Once,  she said to me, “The greatest gift a student can give to their teachers is by studying well, flaring with flying colors”. After an enormous gap of 8 big years, i stand with my education completed(hopefully 😉 Unless, i decide to go for PhD), I achieved a blissful 10 sgpa in my 6th semester exams, topped the university charts. I don’t know, if i made her proud, atleast it’s one of the best things i have done in my life 🙂

I have tried expressing my emotions for her through the following poem. She was a prism through which happiness can be scattered in different wavelengths. Words can’t really describe it all. Yet, an attempt.

Strewn along the spaces of my mind

Are the words you had with me.

Poised your walk, gentle your speech

Simplicity made a remarkable sheen.

Glistening the ambience

With your compassion

Fondling and snuggling

Knowing each child’s streak.

Rugged as a rock or black as coal

Your tender hands

Smoothened all surfaces

Bringing us clean.

A puddle of daily problems

A massacre of life tragedies

Your wand of love

Gusted the filth away.

I question myself

What is it?

That makes you different.

The indulgence, kindness or the thoughtfulness?

It is your soft touch that brought us smiles.

Your warm soul that melted hearts.

The mildness that moulded our brains.

The passion that set new shores.

Enamored with your charisma

I feel so blessed.

Gifted a teacher like you

Removed my life’s stress.

Swept, I was, by cold winds

Torn by the blades of scorn

Grieved by the shades of life

Your words made me strong.

Like the rays of dawn

Penetrating the darkness of night.

Like the wings of a bird

Promising a flight.

Like the scent of a flower

Stimulating my senses.

Like the waves of a sea

Breaking my fences.

Unbound to blood

Unrestricted play of colors.

A timeless connection

That brought me wonders.

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Kho Gaya Ek Rishta Mera (I Have Lost A Relation)

In loving memory of my father. He passed away on 16.05.2012. May his soul rest in peace. Aameen.

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(Hindi version)

Kho gaya ek rishta mera

Kale badalon me kahi

Tez barish ki boondo ne

Chupaya diya use kahi

 ungli pakadkr meri

Chalna usne sikhaya

Ladhkhadai jab jab me

Duadna mujhe sikhaya

Uska saya ghane pedh jesa

Thandak wo de jata

Meri choti choti ankho me

Bade khwab wo jagata

Mere ansuon se

Aankh uski num ho jati th

Doli sajne ki baat pe

Laadli badi yaad ati th

Is khapat duniya me

Meri ek deewar thi

Bachati har khatre se mujhe

me beti  apne baap ki thi

samaj ki zanjeero ko

todha usne mere liye

annayaye k har pahad ko

chalanga usne mere liye

cheen liya khuda ne mujhse

sbse pyara rishta mera

yateemo ki fehris me

aane laga ab naam mera

kaap jati hu me

beshara yu hokar

dar lgta hai is duniya me

apne baap ko khokar

ab koi deewar nahi

akeli hu maidan me

toote phoote khwabo ko

jodh rahi hu me

cheen lo meri hr khushi

lauta do wo rishta mera

beti hu apne baap ki

kho gaya ek rishta mera

(English Version)

 I have lost a relation

Somewhere among the black clouds

Harsh raindrops

Hid it somewhere.

My finger, he held

And made me walk

When i stumbled

To run, he taught.

His shadow like a dense tree

Coolness  it radiated

In my small eyes

He lit big dreams.

My tears

Made his eyes moist

Watching a decorated palanquin

He missed her beloved.

In this ferocious world

I had my wall

Protecting me from all dangers

I , was my father’s daughter.

Chains of society

He broke for me

Every mountain of injustice

He jumped for me.

God snatched

My favorite relation

In the list of orphans

My name now comes.

At times , i shiver

Feel helpless

This world scares me

After losing my father.

Now there’s no wall

Alone, i am in the battle field

Lost, broken dreams

I am  recollecting.

Take away all of my happiness

Return me, my relation

I , am my father’s daughter

I have lost a relation.

Esi hai meri maa ( She is my Mother)

The Hindi Version-

Mohabbat se uska dekhna

Mere dil me jhank lena

mere ankahe shabdo ko padhna

esi hai meri maa

Wo jo thand ki har raat me bhi

Apne deep ki lau se

mujhe sulaye

Wo jo kurkuri dhoop me thanda saya bankar ajaye

esi hai meri maa

Wo jo mere hath me lage kaante nikale

Mere zakhmo me kho kar,

khud ka dard bhul jae

esi hai meri maa

Toofan se darkar

jab me kaap jaaun

Apne seene se mujhe lagakr

Meri nind ko bulaye

esi hai meri maa

Nafrato ki aag

Uska Jazba na mitaae

har mosam, har rang me wo aage badhti jae

esi hai meri maa.

Mere kai saval

jo mere mann me sudbudayen

Ummid dilati hui

mujhe sabke javab de jaye

esi h meri maa

Mom jesi narmi uski

Chandi jesa rang

ehsas uska barish ke pani jesa

Taza krde jo mera mann

esi h meri maa

Har bandhan ko samet ti hui

Surile raag wo gati hui

mehkaati hai angan

apne anchal ki khushbu se

esi h meri maa

meri pehli kilkari pe

mijse zada khush thi wo

mere pehle qadam pe

mujhe aage bula rahi th wo

esi hai meri maa

uski awaz jab kaan me aye

samjho, ek mithas si ghul jaye

hassi uski kitni madhur

behti nadi ki kalkal jesi

esi h meri maa

Jo sirf maa hi nai

Baap ka farz bhi nibhati ayi

Ghane badalo ke andhero se

Aj tak ladhti ayi

esi h meri maa

Kya kahu me uske liye

jo mujhe is duniya me laai

Hath mera thama

Har Rasta dikhati ayi

Uske pyar se bandhkr

kitni haseen lagti hai ye duniya

Na koi fikar, Na koi shikan

Kyuki mere paas h meri maa

Esi hai meri maa

Esi hai meri maa

The English Translation-

With her love filled glance

She insights my heart

Reads my unsaid words

She is my mother.

Every chilling night

With the light of her love lamp

She lulls me asleep

In crispy sunlight, provides her cool shade

She is my mother.

Detracts the thorns in my palms

Loses herself in my wound

She forgets her own pain

She is my mother.

Scared of the storm, I shiver

Embracing me

She calls my sleep

She is my mother.

Fire of hatred

Doesn’t waver her will

In every season, every color, she marches forward

She is my mother.

Many questions

That tickle my mind

Giving me hope

She answers them all

She is my mother.

Her softness like molten wax

Her color like the moon

Her feeling is like rain water

Refreshing my soul

She is my mother.

Collecting all bonds

Singing a melodious tune

Perfumes the courtyard

With the aroma of her garment’s hem

She is my mother.

On my first chuckle

She was happier than me

On my first step

She was calling me forward

She is my mother.

When her voice enters my ears

As if, sweetness mixing in

Her laugh so melodious

Like a rivulet’s playful sound

She is my mother.

Who is not only a mother

Plays the duty of a father too

When dense clouds surround darkness

She kept fighting them off

She is my mother.

What should I say of her

Who brought me in this world

Held my hand

Showed me every path

Coiling in her love

How beautiful this world appears

No worry, no flinch of pain

Because I have my mother.

She is my mother.

She is my mother.

Living a Dream

This whole week or probably a little more, had been one big time FUN. It was a cousin’s wedding. The pre and post wedding events kept me so occupied. Perhaps, leaving no time for any sleep. During this whole period, I understood something beautiful- The purity of this bond called  Marriage. It is enchanting to think for myself , getting into the same bond with someone,someday. My HERO. All of this made me summarise my feelings here.

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I  dream of a day
The best day of my life.
Profoundly indulging my senses
For the most memorable day of my life.

When we will tie bonds of tender love
And caress the sweet laden memories.
The grandeur of your presence will suffice all my life.

My svelte existence clad in a beautiful red
Golden necklace adorning my petite neck.
Lips in light pink and fingers with pretty rings.
Long black hair shimmering as silk.

My palms decorated with henna.
Its color dark and defining.
Upto me elbow the design follows
My subsistence will always keep shining.

My eyes lowered
I’ll wait for you
To have you by my side
Rekindling my sentiments for you.

I promise to be your’s forever
My life in this world and hereafter.
I’ll be your soulmate
My undying love will be your shelter.

The curls of my hair bouncing around my back
My eyes in delirium
Will gaze at the softness of your commitment

Trinkets in my ears will dance with my moves
Red bangles melodiously calling you.
Multicolour their appearance
To add subtlety to my feelings

That day I will  tell you
How much I loved you.
That I veiled myself from every eye
For this day that my beauty is for you.

Illuminating my soul
For the King of My Dreams
I had never let my being into flaunt
For I am yours, and only your’s.

The chastity of my emotions
Will fuel our togetherness.
You will be my life
My soul, my love, my happiness.

I’ll be quiet
My eyes will speak.
I’ll love you sincerely
I’ll be true to your being.

Coverting myself in you
From the breaches of life.
You’ll be my wall
Protecting from all sides.

I think I know you
Vaguely from my dreams.
Destiny will make us meet someday
A heart throb would feel.

That day will be special
Bringing solemnity of our love
And Trueness of our beings
Two bodies, one soul to keep.

Hand in hand
Walking the path called Life.
We will build a nest of Love,call it home
Where cordiality shall reside.

So much I pondered of you
In long starry nights.
To watch the sky together
And feel our warmth.

To silently whisper
Cuddling the togetherness
You will utter
The passion of love.

All my dreams
Set for future.
When I find my man
A marvellous marriage to occur.

I foresee, a life with him
Who will make me complete.
Yes I am a dreamer
And I dream of a face unseen.

But I believe in the sanctity of Marriage
Showered upon with grace of God.
Welcoming an eternal relationship
Collecting blessings from the Almighty.

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